entreats: (i am too far away)
ange "the definition of chuunibyou" ushiromiya ([personal profile] entreats) wrote 2013-02-10 07:22 pm (UTC)

[ .. No.. He's leaving now. He's at the door, he's really going to just walk away from this, walk away from her, and after this whole fiasco things will never be the same between them again. She wants to tell him that it's not true, even if she does get hurt it's because of this place and not him, and that he makes her more happy than anything during the times they just do things together, no matter how little, but.. she can't get any of that out. Her mind is too busy getting overwhelmed by a feeling she's had before.

And it doesn't take too long to realise where she's had that feeling before. That time she heard her family was dead. That moment where she can almost stop them yet in the end can't that repeats over and over in her dreams. When Battler had been staring at her with those soulless eyes, completely gone..

If she'll lose one more important thing like that, she'll break. It's like she's breaking already, a feeling much worse than being torn apart. ]


Senji, stop..! Don't leave me alone...! [ She practically screams it, honestly, and although her voice gets slightly less loud than that as she goes on, it's still obviously desperate and louder than usually. But that cry just now was one of pure desperation, as if he's on the verge of being killed rather than just touching a doorknob. ]

For twelve years I was in so much pain because I lost everything..! I didn't have anything to be happy about anymore, everyone just insulted me and wanted me dead, and.. I.. I really just wanted to die as well.. I didn't have a single thing to live for anymore back home, nothing at all.. and I knew everyone would have been happier either way if I died..!

[ Slowly but surely the words get a little more distorted though, as sobbing sneaks into her voice. She hics, and tears escape her eyes, falling down her cheeks. ]

But here it's different, since.. s-since I had you by my side all this time.. [ She closes her eyes, trying to blink away the tears, but it isn't working. They just keep flowing.. ] All this time I had nobody to talk to, I didn't have anyone at all to rely on..! It's since of you that it changed!

S.. so if you leave, then.. I.. [ .... ] I..! [ She can't even get any more words out than this. The sound of the sobbing coming from her drowns it all out. ]

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