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[entreats]

[ Ange's too lame to actually record a custom voicemail message, but still, feel free to leave a message after the standard message's beep or just normally call her.

Threads for roommates or in-person stuff can also be started here. ]

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[entreats]

[ It's a good thing these phones can't be tapped because anyone listening in would just wonder what the hell is even going on.. ]

They can suck it. [ SEE, IT'S A PUN. Sort of. Whatever. ] They should already be happy enough I'm considerate to stay behind here instead of standing up and walking out like any normal person.

[encored]

[just like how it's good fortune that no one ever walks by when they're talking huh...

sadly the pun-ish thing sails over his head since >modern lingo BUT A FOR EFFORT.]

That is quite a kindness on your part. I wouldn't think your injury would affect your legs, after all. Not your feet or knees and certainly none of your muscles.

[entreats]

Actually, I'm already decomposing.

[ HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE WHEN YOU'RE NOT DEAD...

But she's saying it either way. And it's all she says, even, still with the flattest tone possible. ]

[encored]

Oh. [...] How gross. [his tone isn't flat but he is playing along to such an extent that anyone listening in might actually think they're being serious. THEY NEED HELP]

I do hope you'll stay over on that side, then. No one wants a shambling, rotting body to appear.

[entreats]

[ WHO CAN BRING THEM AN INTERVENTION... ]

That's great to hear. And here I thought you might actually start to miss me just a little bit. [ There's actually more below the dumb comment, since maybe she did hope their actions towards each other during everything what happened meant at least a little, but.. what.. is... saying that... it's hard and no one understands. ]

[encored]

[no one, they are doomed.]

Do you think? Well, if it weren't for the fact that you would perfume the entire apartments with the scent of the rotting dead, I may have. Your wit is the only thing drier than the dirt here, that's quite a talent. [it's okay Ange, that's as close to saying "I missed you a little that's why I called!!" as he can get, too. HE UNDERSTANDS.]

[entreats]

[ Only Charles gets how hard it is to actually say something instead of just vaguely hinting at it through really, really terrible jokes. It's a curse. ]

What, are you saying you might eventually start boring yourself to death otherwise, old man?

[encored]

[it is, but at least they can share the curse... mutual understanding of really dumb communication skills, how lovely.]

I might, you know, and the blame would lie on your shoulders entirely. In fact, I would have to find someone to resurrect you just so I could haunt you instead. You can't be allowed a peaceful rest after condemning me so.

[entreats]

That sounds like it'd be a pain. [ IS THAT HOW YOU'VE DECIDED TO SUM IT UP, ANGE.... ]

I mean, if you're going to die as well, we might as well somehow talk it over in the afterlife. Then I'll say something like "sorry for letting you bore to death" and then you say "no, it's okay, let's have tea instead" and then we forever have tea parties in heaven. Sounds like the perfect fairytale, something like "and then they didn't live, but it sure was happily ever after".

[encored]

[ANGE how are you so great. there's a delicate snort of amusement from his end of the line...]

My, I had never imagined myself with a perfect fairytale ending such as that. Perhaps there's something to be said about our respectively unsuitable and moronic deaths, if that's where it lands us.

[entreats]

Oh, there's a perfect amount of things to say about it. But in the end it all comes down to "we all saw it coming", most likely. Which is exactly what everyone will say when they see our corpses. And then they'll just shake their heads and move on with their days.

[ It's not too far off the mark, right.... ]

There won't even be one of those fancy funerals with tea and cake.

[encored]

[yeah that's pretty accurate... more or less exactly what he expects whenever he kicks the bucket.]

I could certainly see that happening. How unfortunate though, I'd much prefer a fancy funeral than just being left out in the sun to... well, I suppose I wouldn't rot, at least. [his biology will preserve him as a crystal forever or at least until it cracks into dust and blows away in the wind, how romantic]

[entreats]

[ God, Charles, how Twilight can you get!! ]

Aren't we special. [ And with "we" she means Charles, of course.. ] Sorry that us lowly commoners actually have to rot away after all and inconvience everyone else with the terrible smell in our selfish ways.

[encored]

[so twilight that all he's missing is the sparkly sunlight thing!!

anyway that gets an amused snort because hearing it from Ange somehow seems like less of an insult and more of a joke that he can be a part of, even if he's technically the butt of it...] Ah, well, not everyone can be blessed with the ability to not stink up a town after dying. It's an unfortunate thing for the rest of you, but at least you won't have to worry about it in the post-mortem afterlife tea party.

[entreats]

.. Sounds like we're getting off pretty okay in the end then, huh? How lucky. [ Except for the fact they'd.. both.. be.. dead.. but let's ignore that fact for now, obviously. ]

Well, I can't say I'd entirely mind it, either way. You're pretty good company.

[ She managed to get something out without having to do in a really roundabout manner.. good job, Ange!! ]

[encored]

The only fortune I'll have seen in years. [yes even with the whole being dead part apparently... still, he will elegantly sidestep that, too!! or kind of elegantly, because he can't handle that kind of forwardness Ange please. he's so glad this is audio, he will never learn how to gracefully accept people saying they don't mind being around him...]

—Yes, well, I suppose there could be worse situations or people to end up with than you, as well.

[entreats]

[ Oh god, Charles. She's slowly starting to learn why people like teasing her so much about it, because when she's seeing the entirely same attitude with someone else now, even she is starting to feel the urge to push it a little.. not that it means she isn't going to still blame people for embarassing her later. She's a hypocrite, okay. ]

So I actually get placed above some things? Lucky me. I mean, it'd suck if I was less pleasant company than a bunch of crocodiles who haven't eaten in weeks.

[encored]

[it's okay, she's in good hypocritical company. he also teases people with traits that he (sometimes unwittingly) shares... anyway she just gets an INDIGNANT SCOFF at that.]

By a scant margin. Still, it's better than the ranking most here would get.

[entreats]

.. [ She hums a little, as if she's Seriously Considering everything Charles is saying here. ]

I guess I'll have to take it for now. It's already a lot better than what I've been called in the past, so I'm okay with being slightly better company than ferocious animals. .. Although I'd assume other people being a little closer to ferocious animals has more to do with them being boring than them being dangerous, I'm sure. [ She's met some people here that are extreme weenies... ]

[encored]

[haven does have its share of weenies it's true... either way her fake serious consideration appears to be more than enough for him!]

Boredom can be a danger in and of itself, you know. If it were possible to die from it, some people here would be more dangerous than even the most starving of feral beasts. So! You are indeed in a relatively good position, compared to most.

[entreats]

[ Message received, Charles. No matter how it's in the most roundabout way ever. Except there's one more thing that she can't say as directly that she actually was a little worried about until now, especially since she didn't hear from Charles at all..

But then there's the problem. How does she ask it. This isn't something can be said in a roundabout way to begin with but if she says it directly it'll be a disaster.. why is this life so hard. ]

Yeah. [ ... AWKWARD SILENCE.. ]

So.. um. [ God, this is the worst. ] .. You're back to normal now, right?

[encored]

[oh god Ange tried so hard got so far... it's probably a good thing she didn't try for the roundabout route though, considering he might not have gotten it. PEOPLE EXPRESSING CARE IS STILL A NEW THING he's still touched oh no his cold black heart is touched...]

...I am, yes. Thank you. [ENJOY THAT ANGE it is probably like the second genuine thanks he's said in years. there's actually some detectable gratitude in his voice and everything! truly, it is a rarity.] You wouldn't know it, but if I hadn't been returned to normal, I wouldn't be able to hold the telephone.

[entreats]

W-well--!

[ Sorry, but when she's driven into a corner by her own social awkwardness she can't help but get a little tsunsnappy since even though he says "you wouldn't know it" she does remember him not being able to hold the cards back there.. her hand is clutching the phone so tightly that her knuckles are turning white, Ange please don't destroy it accidentally.. at least she did get to hear that genuine thank you, better take a picture so it'll last longer. ]

.. I wouldn't exactly put it beyond you to just go find another way to talk into it. You know, like making someone your slave so they can do it for you or whatever.

[encored]

[tsunsnappy... it's okay, that is a mood he can understand well, and he doesn't even have good reasons for it. he also actually didn't mean that as a jab either, shockingly! he was hoping most people would think he simply didn't want his hand to be seen, not accurately assume that he was physically incapable of using them.]

I would have, certainly! It would be a horrid inconvenience for me on a whole, though. [and not for the person forced into phone holding servitude, apparently??] Just having to depend on others for those four weeks was enough to cure me of the urge.

[entreats]

So no phone slaves for you, got it. [ Phew. Okay, Ange, calm down and breathe, come down from your tsunsnappy cloud when there's no reason to be snappy at all.. ]

I just wanted to make sure though. My eye came back, but I figured that just regrowing an eye wouldn't that big of a deal if they can revive people too. So I didn't know if the same happened for everyone.